after everyone has gone home
A haiku should always be sincere, and oblique enough for the reader to attach their own relevance to it. I prefer the 5 lines a tanka gives, and not too much more, in order not to bore.
Not sure why weeping willows reminds me of childhood. I rather think haiku must be devoid of sentimentality, and here I fear that I have failed. But I was already battling with the sincerity anyway. And as far as the obliqueness goes, well, perhaps the precise meaning is not as real as the mood..